The woman who leads our women’s group doesn’t enjoy reading. I am reasonably sure that she has some difficulties with comprehension too. One of her partners has reading books together as a requirement. For whatever reason, she tells me that it’s not a requirement, but I don’t know what else it is to give somebody a book and then keep asking them when they’re done so you can talk about it. That at the very least feels like pressure to do something that you have no interest in doing.

I can’t build anything. It takes me days to do so when I have to use something new. We got about 4-inches of snow, so I had to winterize my cooler on my own. Last night, I gave up and finally took off the entire fitting because I couldn’t work around the pin to loosen the nut to get the poly water tube taken off.

Now, I did plant the step ladder safely, go up on the roof and take out the nut to the plug to drain what little water was left in the unit. I also had to wrap up the unit and tie straps around it so it was protected from snow. Finally, I reversed directions and came back down to the ground on the ladder. I can do that stuff.

I can’t build a grass catch for a mower.

My son’s wagon handle has hardware that is backwards.

My handwriting is hideous.

I can’t draw.

I couldn’t IMAGINE if my current girlfriend said that we needed to paint together to bond. That would be debilitating for me. I would likely cry while we were painting together.

However, it’s really common in relationships to require something of someone that they don’t like.

I think it’s weird. Reflecting on it, it also seems controlling.

Another thing that I know, from my personal experiences, is that people force compatibility.

You can find someone very physically attractive and have nothing to talk about and not really enjoy each other’s company. Then you have sex and that keeps you together. At least that offers you dopamine hits.

What do you require of a significant other (s.o.) to do with you that is not enjoyable for your s.o.? Do you believe that in relationship you should just go along as well as you can with things that you get no joy out of doing? Why should you require, or at least strongly suggest that a s.o. do something with you that as a grownup, they know that they don’t like doing and will not be adept at doing?