That’s how old I am.

That’s how many hours that I spent with Scorpio.

I told my friend whom I’d met on the dating app that was maybe not wise.

I’m so glad that it worked out.

She’s open hearted and I’m generous, so we were able to get to know each other and have some excitement build naturally.

I’m starting to get attached to her. When we fell asleep on our second night together which was Valentine’s Day we were holding hands. She drifted off more quickly than I and I could feel our heartbeats synchronizing.

I know from my ex-GF that’s oxytocin beginning to build, because I noticed that I could feel hers and my pulse in a movie theater when we were holding hands after she and I had been together almost 4-months. I’d never had that experience prior.

I certainly didn’t expect Scorpio’s and my heartbeats to synch like that after one night together.

I absolutely love kissing her. I can’t remember ever enjoying kissing someone this much. I can read and gauge how she is feeling and is moving when she kisses me. We have lovely chemistry and connection.

When we woke up on Saturday morning, she had to get all pieces of her costume coordinated for the Mardi Gras parade. Then we went to an Art Center and I began meeting her friends. They were welcoming and genuinely interested in connecting with me. That felt so encouraging.

After the parade she handed me a felt rose and kissed me. Scorpio had to remove pieces of her costume and cool off a little bit. We went with her friends to a bar that they always go to after the parade and she asked me to go to the dance floor with her. The band was good. I always find that I feel so uncomfortable on a dance floor, but I had fun watching her and her friends. After a few songs I sat down and realized that it wasn’t safe for us to have her expensive speaker and all the pieces of her costume that she made at the bar. I told her that I was going to take our things back to our hotel, which I did.

When I came back, one of her friends sat on the bench with me on the dance floor and put her arm around me and said, “I’m so glad that I got to meet you!”

Is it natural to begin contrasting relationships when you begin a new one?

I didn’t like any of my ex-GFs friends. I found them shallow and status driven.

Scorpio’s friends are entertaining and all pure love. We had lunch with them and laughed and connected. I’m not very good in a group; however, I can connect with folks 1-1 and found doing so with her friends was seamless.

I don’t like or wear gold. My ex-GF’s daughter picked out a gold necklace that she wanted and then my ex-GF gave it to me for Christmas. Later in the spring, after I’d already tried to break up with her, she bought me my birthstone on a silver necklace. I’m thinking that was just because I had ordered her a custom ring to replace the two diamond rings that men had sold which were hers. It was like something transactional.

Scorpio took the lyrics to an intro to an 80s rap song and wrote a poem about her manifesting her Valentine. She illustrated a little comic book too. Her gift to me which accompanied the comic book was Lego love bears, and we’ll be putting them together next weekend by the fire at her house. She made the comic book and wrapping paper from a paper bag and it was beautiful. I didn’t want to unwrap it. I was so touched that she believes that she needed me and put out into the world that she wanted a girlfriend and a Valentine. I am excited to put our Lego bears together too. I wonder if she’ll let me take them both? Likely she’ll keep one. I’ll put the other one in my hutch.

My ex-GF took a painting that she made at her daughter’s second birthday off of her wall in her group practice room and wrapped it in Christmas paper then she gave it to me after my birthday when I turned 50. She would also talk shit about three paintings that I have, which are originals, that the only other Cancer (who is a professional artist and also a small town Mayor) I’ve ever dated gave to me. One was for my son’s room and the others are a set which was my birthday present in 2013. This particular woman wrote on the back of each of the sets: “For ______ with love and kisses. Happy Birthday I’m glad you were born.”

After Scorpio and I had a long dinner together at a wine bar downtown on Friday the 13th, we walked back to our hotel hand in hand. She put on music and started kissing me. Our first intimate connection was an extension of lots of kissing and touching.

My ex-GF although she had full lips, didn’t like kissing much. I had to beg her in October to make out with me and she texted that it had to have a 30-minute limit. That night we wound up being in my bed over an hour; however, that she even had limitations stated is just so gross. That time and only one other time did we had hot, passionate kissing.  The other instance was when I had talked to her about a woman feeling me up in a karaoke bar a couple of weeks before. We were together a year. We had sex 7 times total.

Why would I stay with someone for a year who really only wanted me as status? She also likes that I make a really good living. I know now that she really only wanted me to live with her and adopt and support her 3-year-old.

I want to be liked because I am me. I don’t want someone to want me because I make 137k a year.

I don’t particularly enjoy gifts. If one is given to me, I want it to be from the heart.

I love sensuality and being physical. I don’t want to ask (beg) for it. I want intimacy to just happen. Scheduling it is so impersonal and take away what I crave always, which is magic.

I’m now dating a river mermaid who’s like a fairy. She is all pure love. She’s romantic, funny and so sexy. I know that I’m walking into love.