The moon is nearly full, is it not? It was tenuous all weekend and then as usual, something that I said, which followed logically for me was inflammatory for her yesterday. Shit, just after she had just called me “honey” too. I think she gets what I was saying now, but it’s so weird to piss off your gf all the time and have to explain yourself. Part of this is my fault, because the peeps who I hang out with have known me four-years at a minimum. They get me. I’m in your face, and totally WYSIWYG. The thing is that I’m a good person and a nurturer. I’m not used to be challenged at the character level. I have a good soul and would do anything for my friends.
So, it still feels like I barely dodged yet another break-up. It’s a shitty pattern. I don’t feel safe at all. It’s the way things are with a woman who has to look for loopholes for a living though, so it’s probably my lot until she trusts me.
I want to be with her this weekend. I miss the way that she smells and feels. Friday can’t come soon enough for me and I can’t wait to connect to her. I love her.